I had the surreal honor of doing a Q&A with the late, great Val Kilmer at a big comic book convention that didn’t turn out quite as planned.
Donald Trump loves to talk about trusting his gut. Too bad his gut is racist as fuck.
Donald Trump and Elon Musk know that paid protesters exist, since they’ve used them fairly extensively, but the idea that people need to be paid handsomely to publicly object to the actions of Musk an Trump is insane.
For my Shudder pick of the month, I watched a compelling New Zealand horror movie about the agony of old age, with terrific performances by Geoffrey Rush and John Lithgow as a lunatic who does sick things with the titular baby doll puppet.
Cannon's shameless Indiana Jones knock-off may be derivative, but at least it's incredibly racist!
The ongoing mistake that is Corey Feldman month continues with his directorial debut, a dreadful, cut-rate Naked Gun knockoff, but with tons of boobs! Who thought this was a good idea?
Because not every blog post can be about Trump or Musk. Sometimes I write about things that AREN’T terrible.
John Travolta has big fun with a very big performance as a colorful lawman/law-breaker in the appealingly vulgar exploitation movie To Paris With Love.
The Travolta/Cage Project
Nathan Rabin loves John Travolta and Nicolas Cage so much he’s committed to watching EVERY movie they’ve appeared in for a column that will take a good five years to finish, The Travolta/Cage Project, the print version of the smash-hit, impossibly lucrative podcast Travolta/Cage.
John Travolta has big fun with a very big performance as a colorful lawman/law-breaker in the appealingly vulgar exploitation movie To Paris With Love.
Hey, you know what movie is great? Get Shorty. That movie is SO good.
Shortly before the release of Battflefield Earth John Travolta contributed a voice to 1999’s Our Friend, Martin, an insane special with the balls to ask, “Why don’t 12 year olds from the present travel back in time to save Martin Luther King’s life?”
The Big Whoop
Nathan Rabin has a LOT on his mind. That’s why he’s hopped onboard the blog revolution with the Big Whoop, a daily blog about fatherhood, politics, entertainment and whatever the hell else he wants to write about.
In his memoir, Matthew Perry described the filming of the 2002 grossout comedy Serving Sara as a personal and professional nadir. So I had to see it.
He’s not wrong! It’s mind-bogglingly awful, a featherweight comedy that’s actually a tragedy.
I had the surreal honor of doing a Q&A with the late, great Val Kilmer at a big comic book convention that didn’t turn out quite as planned.
Donald Trump loves to talk about trusting his gut. Too bad his gut is racist as fuck.
Donald Trump and Elon Musk know that paid protesters exist, since they’ve used them fairly extensively, but the idea that people need to be paid handsomely to publicly object to the actions of Musk an Trump is insane.
Because not every blog post can be about Trump or Musk. Sometimes I write about things that AREN’T terrible.
In our world, Elon Musk is a selfish asshole ruining the government out of greed and arrogance, but a perplexingly ubiquitous AI version of Elon Musk behaves with Christ-like selfishness.
Politically and culturally, we’re in a shitty 1980s teen sex comedy where the bullies think of themselves as the irreverent, propriety-puncturing heroes.
Diversity used to be seen as good. Why is it now considered the greatest evil? Other than Woke?
The 51st state shit was never funny but now it’s looking increasingly psychotic.
I am very bad with money, and in way too much debt, but I have a strategy to make things better.
I understand why Rosie O’Donnell moved to Ireland to avoid Trump but I wish she didn’t give the MAGA mob the satisfaction of successfully chasing her out of the country.
Sometimes you learn something about someone that makes you think of less of them, like learning that they’re a Megyn Kelly super-fan.
For self-professed patriots, the MAGA mob sure seems to hate most things about our country.
Rock stars are NOT going to respond to your comments about them on random Facebook posts, with the notable exception of the controversial and provocative Amanda Palmer.
Rando!
Morbid curiosity led me to watch and write about 2022’s On the Line, an imaginary-seeming vehicle for a disgraced yet busy Mel Gibson as a prankish shock jock having one crazy night, in one of SEVEN movies he made that year.
After triumphing with the Oscar-winning Maniac Cop trilogy, writer Larry Cohen and director Wiliam Lustig reunited for 1996’s Uncle Sam, a curdled social satire/dark comedy/horror movie, which does not make good on its promise to be the most amazing film ever made.
They wanted some of that Max Headroom feeling for 1996’s Lawnmower Man 2: Beyond Cyberspace, and they figured that since Matt Frewer is Max Headroom he must have it in spades.
Big Ass Articles
In honor of President’s Day I’m re-running this article, featured in my new book The Joy of Trash, about Mike Bloomberg’s tragicomic, but mostly just hilarious attempt to buy the Democratic nomination for president in 2020.
Once upon a time, a struggling fast food franchise called Rax tried to re-vamp their image with new spokesman Mr. Delicious, a depressed, broke, unhappily married loser with a drinking problem. It did not go well.
The 2017 vanity project Michael Jackson’ s Halloween portrays the late pop icon as the essence of love and childhood innocence but is redeemed by a wall-to-wall soundtrack of Michael Jackson jams.
Why are movies that get the future of technology bizarrely wrong, like The Lawnmower Man, so weirdly charming and fun?
I had to become a dad to be able to appreciate the single most heart-breaking moment in It’s a Wonderful Life.
Five thousand words on music, memory, childhood, sadness, imprisonment, despair AND the First ever Blues Brothers Con at Old Joliet Prison. It was a trip, y’all!
It all comes down to this! Feld-Month covers Corey Feldman and his scantily clad all-female backing band Corey's Angels' shamelessly entertaining, as well as just plain shameless, Branson, variety-show-style two-hour-plus live extravaganza in Atlanta. It's uh, well, it's something. Just read!
In this piece collected in my new book The Joy of Trash, I explore the infinite humiliations of Gal Gadot and Friends’ notorious cover of “Imagine” by some jerk.
Some pieces age better than others. This piece from 2020 that is collected in The Joy of Trash flippantly argued that there was nothing Jeremy Renner could do that would make us all forget his dumb app. Turns out I was VERY wrong.
For the first entry in My Year of Flops II: The Desolation of Smaug we do a VERY deep dive into Kevin Spacey’s bonkers Youtube video Let Me Be Frank.
Clickbait
Fake news, hilarious cyber-satire that’s easy to misunderstand.
Whether you’re a small child or a punk hitting your bottom on heroin and cocaine in the late 1970s, Yo Gabba Gabba! is full of life lessons.
We hope you're hungry for some meaty arguments!
A totally non-clickbait article on why everything you love and revere sucks shit.
We never should have even thought about writing this article.
Not all celebrities remain rich and famous forever. Here are five who went from wealth and fame to being homeless street trash.
We were going to share some neat trivia about actress Mena Suvari but since you don’t even know who she is we’re not even going to bother.
You’ve seen all the memes! Now see them all again, this time with punishingly literal commentary!
We know you remember and love all of these classic but we need clicks, baby! Sweet, sweet clicks!
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In his memoir, Matthew Perry described the filming of the 2002 grossout comedy Serving Sara as a personal and professional nadir. So I had to see it.
He’s not wrong! It’s mind-bogglingly awful, a featherweight comedy that’s actually a tragedy.